Gunther's Curious Love Letter
by Jatd4ever
Summary: Why was it that his words flowed so freely when he spouted insults?(Gunther/Jane)


***I do not own Jane and the Dragon or its characters**

**Shoutout to Amelle Kyre for her lovely reviews. Hope you enjoy!**

**2017 update : edited for clarity and readability. Might write a second chapter to this someday. **

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The words on the parchment were an insult to his intelligence. It had Gunther three hours just to write the opening to his letter, or should he say love letter? It was common knowledge except to the one who it mattered most, that Gunther held certain affections for a red headed knight called Jane. Some days, it was almost of no consequence, other days it was as though he were dying of such love. Why was it that his words flowed so freely when he spouted insults?

He had hoped the garden might inspire him to write pleasing verses, and dulcet words that would convince her of his true affection, but how could he when all he wrote was _"You must know by now that I hold affection for you, and if you do not, then you are more thick headed then I thought."_

All that would inspire Jane to do was beat him to a pulp. The glistening dew, butterflies fluttering about, his desperation annoyed by the wind, he was surrounded by beauty, but found little pleasure in it. Now, if he were in the yard, trading remarks with the fiery enigma, the blood rushing to his head might actually make him smarter. During his self depreciation, Dragon landed next to him, who could smell the distress as well as whatever he used to make his hair so shiny. Spotting the paper in his hands, he eyed it curiously. "What have you got there short life?"

Rolling it up, he sighed "Does it matter?"

"Not really, but your face looks funny. What is the matter? Cannot go to the privy? I swear short lives do not like their vegetables as much as they should"

Nevermind his privy habits, what about his silent arguments with beating organs? "As you can see," he sighed." I am trying to write a letter."

With a smile stretching over his scaly green lips, Dragon asked in a sing song voice. "What kind of letter? Is it a secret?"

"Apparently not."

"Really? Then what is it for?"

Dusting himself off, he began to pace back and forth nervously. "There is a girl, a girl of the court who likes me…I think."

"What, you do not know? Do not worry shortlife, I would be glad to help. Who is it? I bet it is the new scullery maid."

Where was a rock to hide under, or a body of water to hide in? Lips bitten, he turned away, hoping to hide from his emotions. Why was it so hard? Perhaps, because he had so much to lose. Gunther groaned, hands twisted, and he crumpled the paper unintentionally. "It is to no one in particular."

Dragon looked unimpressed. "Really? Should of known, shortlives cannot make up their minds."

"No, the letter… it is to someone, a person who rides a dragon, and acts like a man in some respects, though clearly she… She is defiantly feminine. I… there are words which will never pass between us, if that is what you are thinking."

"No way, you mean to say it is for Jane?"

"Shut up!"

Instead of the rage that Gunther thought he would provoke, he got advice. "Why write a letter when you can do better?"

"Like what?"

Making kissy faces, Dragon picked a flower. "Why not get her flowers or something. That seems to work for the cook and the gardener"

"First of all no, and second, Jane would not believe that I... She would think me jesting with her"

"It cannot be that hard. Are you so terribly in love with her that it makes you mad?"

"Be quiet"

"There are just some thing's I will never understand. I mean all you have to do is tell her right?"

"Do you think if it was so easy I would be talking to you about it? No, because I am much better with a sword then with smooth words."

"Hey Gunther?"

"What?"

Watching the small puff of hair that was hiding behind a nearby tree, Dragon let out a chuckle "I forgot to tell you that Jane has been listening this whole time"

"WHAT?"

Making herself known was not the embarrassing part, but her response to Gunther was."Gunther, you do not look so good, perhaps you should rest"

Thinking of ways to plot his revenge, almost nothing could justify what Dragon had done. He was ready to leave without a word like he normally did when he fought with Jane, but she stopped him. Leaning over, she kissed him on the forehead. "Thanks for trying"

After that she walked away, leaving Gunther in a state of shock and astonishment. "Did that happen or was I dreaming?" He asked dreamily to Dragon

"I might have blinked so I cannot tell you for sure if it did"

Touching the spot on his forehead where he was kissed, he asked "Does this mean I have a chance?"

"Why are you asking me?"

"Because you know her best."

Drawing out a heart in the ground then drawing an x across it, Dragon said warmly "Jane has a funny way of showing her feelings."

"Great, you just have to ruin it for me"

"But I can tell you something."

"What?"

"She smiled at you, that has to amount to something right?"

Covering his face with his hands, Gunther mumbled to himself, hoping Dragon would not overhear. "I cannot allow myself to hope where there is none."

"It never stopped you before."

By now all the troubles of the day, combined with the frustrations of youth and a love letter, gave Gunther quite a headache. "I think I need to go home and lie down."

"You go do that."

Once Gunther is out of sight, Jane come back, curious for details. "Is he going to be alright?"

"Of course not, it appears Gunther has a bad case of kissy face and enough hormones to fill an ocean."

"Should I tell him?"

"Are you kidding? And deny me the right to watch him struggle through his misery while I laugh at yours? Never. I think he will figure it out on his own."

Jane wanted to defend him, but it was hard to keep a straight face when the thought of his embarrassed face came to mind. "Dragon it is not funny." which was followed by another giggle.

Drain nudged her, wearing a smirk that could be seen from miles away. "Look at you trying to pretend that you do not like like him when you do. I knew, I knew it all the time."

"Dragon, it really is not funny."

"Yes it is."

"Oh really?"

"Do you know that you two lie so much, that you should be dead."

"What does that even mean?"

"No idea."

Picking up the crumpled letter Gunther left behind, she smoothed it out, giggling over its contents. "Perhaps I will send him a letter, it would smooth things out."

Like always, Dragon was ready with advice. "Good, and do not forget the parts that say you can hardly breath when he looks at you with those sharp eyes."

"I can write my own letter thank you."

"You mean love letter"

"Whatever sort of letter it is, it is none of your concern green lips. Now, if you will excuse me I have things to do."

Shaking his head, all Dragon could do was laugh at the silliness of his fellow shortlives and fly off to search for whatever endeavors the cows had in store for him that day.


End file.
